Baltimore Business Daily

How do you make a baltimore zoo? the only bar ever that made a baltimore zoo closed down, and I no longer have the recipe... Its one of the best drinks ever, it doesnt taste bad, but it gets you messed up like crazy. It has like 6 or 7 different liquors in it.

Does anyone know how to get from the Woodberry Light rail station to the Baltimore zoo? Online directions are not working because it wont recognize the Baltimore Zoo's address when it has no street number and it's just a park. So can anyone tell me in detail how to get to the baltimore zoo upon exiting the Woodberry Light Rail station in Baltimore?

How do you get to the Maryland Zoo in Baltimore? I have gotten many different responses from both people and websites on the easiest and fastest way to get to the Maryland Zoo. I am from Baltimore so I don't live too far, and I was wondering if anyone could share the best ways they have gone. I am bringing a child with me, but he is not my child, so although Park Heights Avenue seems like an easy enough way to go, it goes through some bad neighborhoods that I'm not comfortable driving through with a small child in tow. I have heard from some that taking 83 is best, and others say just go Northern Parkway. I am nervous about getting lost with this child in the car, and really all I want to know are people's experiences going different ways and which way they have found works best. Thanks so much for any and all help!

Anyone work at the Baltimore Zoo in Baltimore, Maryland? what is the name of the hospital they use for their animals?

Are they ever gonna add any new things or animals to the Baltimore Zoo? When I was little I felt like going to the zoo was a lot of fun, but now it seems run down and everything seems to getting taken away. When are they gonna put anything new in?

anyone a vet tech preferably at the baltimore zoo, but any zoo will do!? i graduate in may and will be a CVT, i want to work in a zoo and have a ton of questions, if i could get your email address to ask some questions i would be so so greatful!

What happend to the tigers at the Baltimore Zoo?!? I loved them and now there gone :'(

Anyone work at the Baltimore Zoo? I want to do an animal keeper internship there, any information how to get in?

what kind of conservation concerns are expressed in the maryland zoo in baltimore?

Has anyone ever had a Baltimore zoo?? if so can u tell me what's in the drink?? had one loved it and would like to make one at home. I din't have it in Baltimore, had it at timbucktu in va.

Which zoo is better Baltimore Zoo or DC Zoo? Why?

The baltimore zoo or the aquarium???...which one is worth the time and money?

Which zoo is better the National Zoo or the Baltimore Zoo?

national zoo in baltimore md? ill be in dc and am going to the zoo there, wondering if the aquarium in baltimore would be worth the little drive and the 30.00 admission price??? any thought what are some of their main attractions??? thanks!

What zoo is free admission Baltimore or Washington DC?

what should I wear to the zoo, in 50 degree weather? I'm going to the Baltimore Zoo tomorrow. The weather is supposed to be 50 and cloudy, what should I wear?

is there a lawsuit against baltimore zoo?

Why do people not go to the Maryland zoo in Baltimore?

Help me to choose between Washing Zoo OR Baltimore inner harbour walk? Pls help me to chose between above. We had been to DC and seen most of the museums.This cherry blossom,we will visit again and spend 12th apr, at DC. We are planning either to drive and visit baltimore for 4-5 hrs OR go to DC zoo (for 5 yr old son). Help me to choose. Never been to baltimore, thinking of brief visiting it for few hrs (13th morning drive from DC hotel , spend 4-5 hrs and drive back for 5 hrs). Is it feasible? OR DC zoo would be better? Thanks in advance for tips. btw,forgot to ask: how will be weather in baltimore, on 13th apr, to take a walk / water taxi? We will be taking rest for 12th night at hotel, so should be fresh at around 9AM to drive to balimore, spend 4-5 hrs and start traveling back (5-6hr) to sweet home:). any comments on iternary? TIA. Any parking suggestions (for strolling around) for ~6 hrs at baltimore inner harbour on 13th Apr (sunday)

Does anyone know why there are no polar bears at the National Zoo? I took my daughter to the Maryland Zoo in Baltimore and they have a really nice polar bear exhibit. But it occurred to me that the National Zoo does not. I recall there being polar bears there when I was a child(I am 29) but now there aren't. But I am thinking that it was due to a child falling in the enclosure. I could be wrong. But I just want someone to let me know the real reason. I can't seem to find anything about why they don't have them or what even happened there.

which do you like better, The MD zoo in Baltimore or the national zoo in DC? which should i go to

I live in PA near Philly and I love zoos. What other zoos are close to the Philly zoo besides Baltimore? Zoos that are close to Philadelphia, PA

How long will the trip will be? Flying from Baltimore to San Diego, driving from San Diego to Palm Springs? We flying into Baltimore next Wednesday for a family wedding. We will visit family and tour Baltimore and go to the zoo and science musuem and dock. Next Friday, we will fly into San Diego. We will be there until the following week, Friday. Then in 2 weeks on the following Friday of next week, we will drive to Palm Springs. How long is the flight from Baltimore to San Diego? How long is the drive from San Diego to Palm Springs?

MD Zoo to Phili Zoo trip? How long does a trip take from the Baltimore Zoo to the Philadelphia zoo? Or how long is a trip from Baltimore to Philadelphia?

enable visitors to feed what kind of animal from a platform? Beginning in Spring 2007, the Baltimore Zoo added a new feeding station in the Harold & Selma Taylor African Journey that will enable visitors to feed what kind of animal from a platform?

what is there to do in inner harbor in baltimore? My fiance and I are getting married in 3 weeks and we are going to inner harbor for our honeymoon, and i was wondering what all there is to do down there. and i can't go to an amusement park cause i'm pregnant. i know they have a zoo and aquarium, science center and stuff but anything else fun? let me know thanks (:

does anyone know where i can go crabbing in maryland? we are going to be in baltimore so anything close by? we are going on vacation in maryland. and i was wonderiong if anyone knew anywhere close by where we can go crabbing? we are going to be in baltimore near the inner harbor where the zoo is?if you know please write or reply back. thanks

What activities would a high school zoology club do? My friend and I are looking to start a zoology club within our high school. What sort of things can we do? We live near D.C., in Maryland specifically, and we weren't sure of activities that the club could sponsor... We've already come up with the ideas of visiting the National Zoo in Washington D.C, and the Baltimore Aquarium, and volunteering at local animal shelters, but what are some other things we can do?

What are some good Washington places to visit? Our family of three is visiting the Washington, DC and Baltimore area for a few days and we're looking for opinions of others who've been here on where to go. We visited the National Zoo and we're minutes away from monuments and the White House. Please help us out (tours, areas, monuments worth visiting more than others, etc)

Would it be smarter to stay at two hotels if I'm going from one city to the next? My boyfriend and I are going to Baltimore, MA for 4 nights and 5 days. We're also taking a day trip from Baltimore to Washington, DC to visit the Smithsonian zoo and a few other museums. We were thinking of staying in one hotel for 2 days in Baltimore and then another hotel for 3 days in Washington. What should we do? Baltimore is only 2 hours from us. (PA)

high school internship at the zoo or aquarium? so im a junior in high school right now. i REALLY want to get an internship this summer either at the zoo or aquarium. i live in northern VA around the DC area. there's the national zoo but their internship program is for HS seniors and run through the school year...therefore, not an option :( i havent looked into the baltimore aquarium yet but im about to. its kind of far away though, that would be a really hard commute. anyone have any ideas?? i want to pursue eiter zoology, biology, or marine boilogy when i get older.

what should i get my mentally disabled brother for xmas? we and my two brothers and my man were thinking about taking him to the Baltimore zoo he likes the zoo. i try ed to ask him what he wants he can not fully talk he can talk but not that good and he is in a wheel chair most of the time he can walk but not that good me and my two brothers my mom are takeing him to see santa this saturday at the mall he likes animals but we have 5 ' four are ares and then the 5 cat is miss shannon cat she is the live in cna gor my brother

Bartender question!? Does anyone know what goes in a "Baltimore Zoo"? I remember hearing about and so do my friends but we can't figure out what goes in it!!

its my boyfriends last weekend in baltimore before he leaves for college.? what is something fun we could do besides going to orioles games? no were not going to the zoo or aquarium... haha ok besides sex. wed be doing that anyway

Can anyone help me pick my next spiritual vacation with my 5 year old daughter? our choices are as follows: 1. singing rocks in PA 2. Salem Mass, and Niagra Falls with Canada 3.Virginia beach, bush gardens and Williamsburgh VA 4. DC zoo, and two museums *this trip we do two at a time to really experience the museum* tai food near Georgetown and see some of the political sites for our troops like Iwo Jima and Arlington Cemetary where I will be after I die. 5.Baltimore zoo, and aquarium and a ferry ride to fell's point. hooking up with her aunt and cousin. if anyone has any other suggestions please feel free to add them. I am east coast and cannot go to other countries or even across my own, so those will be ignored if written. ty all for your ideas and help. :) (((propreno))) ty so much I think you're right!!!

This woman chased me at the park? Ok, so the weirdest thing happened to me. I was at the Baltimore zoo yesterday. It was a hot nice day for the most part. but around 3pm started to get really windy. So I was just walking around looking at the animals when I saw a furry thing flying in the air. The wind was blowing trash and all. So I decided to pick it up and put it in the trash. Few seconds later, I see this fat Black woman running towards me. Her eyes were red, she looked furious and saliva was dripping from her mouth. I started running so fast.. She was trying to kill me or something.. She was then captured by the zoo keepers. Apparently, she was upset at me cause that furry thing was her wig and i put it in the trash. that was so crazy. awww... I know you are all happy that I'm back.. HA!!!! I'm back so get ready!!!

I need some advice on which city to visit, Nashville or Baltimore.? Okay, well I rarely get an opportunity to travel, but I have lived in a few different places in my 25 years so I not entirely dumb when it comes to being in new places. So, I would like to get a few expert opinions from you avid travelers out there on which city would be a better use of my time and money. Actually this trip is supposed to give me a better idea on where I would like to live once I finish my degree since I am tired of being in this conservative little area. My main interest and passion is music which is why I am interested in seeing Nashville. However, I love being near the water and would also like to see Baltimore's harbor area. Which one in your opinion has the better restaurants? I'm assuming Baltimore would have Nashville beat in the seafood area and Nashville would possibly have better southern style food. Which has more attractions (museums, zoos, shopping, theaters, live events, etc.) and/or better nightlife? I live in southern VA so Baltimore is actually closer by car, but I don't mind driving.

Fun tourist attractions in Washinton D.C. / Baltimore area? I dont go up that way that often but my parents are making me go there for the weekend and my aunt promised we could do something of my choice. i dont know what to do...when i thought about it i chose the holocaust museum because i learned about it in english and wanted to learn more about it but i quickly changed my mind because i want my cousin to be included and its not right for her so i wanna go somewhere fun i then looked at six flags but my mom said that wouldnt be right to ask that and she suggested the aquarium but not that either but maybe the zoo.....any more ideas/?

When you were a kid, what were your most memorable field trips when you were in school? Living in the DC area, memorable ones include field trips to DC, Baltimore, Philadelphia, zoos, museums, camp sites, a water treatment plant, canoeing, etc. I know it's not directly a religious question, i just want to have some light questions for the R&S people

Fun things to do in Maryland? Hi, my older sister lives in Maryland and my boyfriend and i have decided to drive up there for some of spring break. I know about the zoo and the aquarium in Baltimore but what else is there to do? My sister lives in Bel Air but we are willing to drive just about anywhere in the state. She can't really join us for everything because she has to work and she doesnt have too much extra money. We will also definitely be eating crabs! =]. So i'm trying to semi-plan our trip. any ideas?

Does anyone kno any good places to take my 15 month old son..? in Baltimore.. i think hes gonna get hurt at chuckie cheese and i want to do something more than just going to the park.. but not the zoo or anything like that.

What do I Need????? ok im going on this washington dc/baltimore trip in august and we are going to six flags kings dominion the national zoo a red soxs game a huge mall down there and some other things i dont remember the other stuff but wat should i bring down as some good supplies????????? its on a trip with the school and u have 2 pay and i did but now i wanna no some good supplies i should bring to prepare myself................ any ideas???? p.s im a girl....

can these grades get me into johns hopkins, cornell, columbia...? I am a going to be a junior next year and i want to know if i can get in. some of these are predictions of what i will do, some are what i have already done. by the way i did really bad my first semester freshman year but i got straight a's the next semester. gpa: 3.79-3.93 im hoping\ freshman: Algebra 2 honors B/A Spanish 4 honors C/A US History honors B/A English honors A/A Chemistry Honors A/A Gym A/A Technology A/A Sophmore: Precalculus honors A/A AP Spanish Lang. A/A Biology honors A/A AP NSL A/A Digital Art A/A Physic honors A/A English honors A/A these are the classes i plan to take junior: AP Biology (double period) AP English AP World History AP calculus Molecular Genetics (double period) Senior: AP English AP Psych Multi-variable Calculus/Differential Equations Anatomy honors AP Chemistry (double period) Jazz Band (guitar) Extracurriculars: varsity hockey 2 years varsity baseball 2 years debate team model UN 3 years Future Medical Masterminds Science National Honors Society Math, Technology, and Science academy volunteering: i hope to end with 260 hours because at our school we get a special award for doing 230 the national zoo an organization that helps those less fortunate in baltimore my brothers rec baseball team volunteer EMT SAT hopefully 2200+ (1450+) I know my freshman grades will hurt me but i heard that colleges like to see improvement and i jumped right back on after that and i hope to get all a's until the end of senior year. This took me a while to write so could you help me? Anyone who graduated from any of these schools or ivy league your advice would be greatly apreciated. thanks

I live in Central PA, where are cool places to go within 6hrs driving distance? I live in Central PA and we are taking a vacation from work next week, but we don't know where to spend our time! I was thinking maybe Gettysburg or Baltimore at Inner Harbor. I would like to gpo through the zoo and aquarium. Any other ideas? We are not really beach people-I don't care for sand! We like animals and zoo's, so maybe Philadelphia Zoo-but what else is there to do in Philly for a couple days? Anyone have any idea's for us? Thank you so much!!

I need ideas for my vacation........HELP? Funds of course now adays a low and this is the first year in 10years of being a parent and wife hat i am planning a family vacation. i wanted to try and rent a timeshare for a few days but this just isn't working for me. I live in the washington,d.c. / baltimore area so i know that i can take the kids to the national zoo for free and the smithsonian museums for free, along with the beach, but after that what else is there. Mind you my sister and I are trying to plan this together and haven't got a clue ages for our children run from 7months up to 14 years old 3 girls 2 boys. Keep in mind we are toting a baby we can't go to amusement parks or theme parks because bot the baby and my sister suffer from xtreme heat stroke... ANY SUGGESTIONS? ALL HELP WELCOMED :) thanks to all that answered but please keep in mind were are almost close to broke we can't go over seas it must be some where on the east coast that we can drive to within 4-7 hours tops.

Can someone give me advice on stomach issues? My boyfriend and I are going to Baltimore, MD for a week (5 days) in the second week of May. It'll be our first vacation together, alone, as a couple. (we're 23) I have a pretty bad "bathroom schedule". I have to do #2 in the morning, every morning! Then a few times during the day and sometimes not even depending on what I eat. I am overweight and am trying to be healthy, but I feel I have 4 months to regulate my stomach. I don't want to spend my vacation in every bathroom in Baltimore! I just don't! I wonder if I eat that activia yogurt for 4 months, will my stomach be okay? What can I do so I don’t have to go #2 all the time? We’re going to be walking around and in an our of museums and the zoo. I don’t want to have bathroom breaks every 10 minutes! And it’s not pee that I am worried about. It’s #2! Plus, I get bad anxiety and when I feel the slightest bit of indigestion I get really anxious and will make my self sick! I don’t want to ruin this vacation. 4 minutes ago - 4 days left to answer.

ryanas resume?????????????? Ryana Daniels ryanadaniels@yahoo.com 4364 37st San Diego CA 92105 Denise Sanders 1501 Black Gap Rd Baltimore, MD 21281 (621) 555-6152 Employment Objective Cashier position in a major retail company with potential future opportunities in related customer service areas. Qualificaton • Accurately managed a cash draw in Baltimore's busiet Men's Department • Handled customer inquiries and solved billing problems. • Dealt with a diverse customer population. • Enthusiastic and cooperative. Education Earning High School diploma From Herbert Hoover High And will graduate in jne Experience Cashier, june 2007 San Diego Zoo Gift Shop, San Diego Caliornia Handling all cash and credit card transactions in department store environment. Balanced cash draw at close of shift. Frequently closed store and secured building. One of only two cashier's who held a building key. Cashier, DSW Shoe store, , San Diego Caliornia Handled all transactions, both in person and via telephone, for this upscale floral botique. Successfully managed high volume sales. Inventory Monitor, 1991 - 1995 J.C. Holmes Department Store, Temecula, California Monitored supply of women's clothing and jewellrey inventory. Duties included retail shelf stocking and back-up inventory ordering. Extracoricular activites Hoover Varsity basketball Hobbies Ballet

Can someone give me advice on this situation? I had to post this question like 9x because I kept getting spam! My boyfriend and I are going to Baltimore, MD for a week (5 days) in the second week of May. It'll be our first vacation together, alone, as a couple. (we're 23) I have a pretty bad "bathroom schedule". I have to do #2 in the morning, every morning! Then a few times during the day and sometimes not even depending on what I eat. I am overweight and am trying to be healthy, but I feel I have 4 months to regulate my stomach. I don't want to spend my vacation in every bathroom in Baltimore! I just don't! I wonder if I eat that activia yogurt for 4 months, will my stomach be okay? What can I do so I don’t have to go #2 all the time? We’re going to be walking around and in an our of museums and the zoo. I don’t want to have bathroom breaks every 10 minutes! And it’s not pee that I am worried about. It’s #2! Plus, I get bad anxiety and when I feel the slightest bit of indigestion I get really anxious and will make my self sick! I don’t want to ruin this vacation. 4 minutes ago - 4 days left to answer.

Why doesn't Austin have more culture.? I used to live in Austin, Texas. I moved to San Marcos two months ago to finish my last year at Texas State University. I've been wondering this question for quite sometime. Why doesn't Austin have more culture? Why doesn't The Live Music Capital of the World have an opera, symphony, or orchestra? Not everybody wants to go down to 6th Street and rub elbows with frat boys while 40 y/o adolescents play Rock-a-Billy? Why doesn't Austin have more museums, a theme park, a real zoo, aquarium, planetarium, or a live theater? Yes I know San Antonio is right down the road. So what! Baltimore is right down the road from Washington, DC. They have all those things there. San Diego is right down the road from LA. They have all those things there. Milwaukee is right down the road from Chicago. They have all those thing there. Orlando is right down the road from Tampa. They have all those things there. To me, it would seem even more impractical to drive down to San Antonio for all the festivities with the prices of gas soaring through the roof. Why does the entire cultural hearth of Austin have to revolve around either the Capital, 6th street, and the University? Why doesn't Austin have more diversified festivities? I'm going to ask as many times as it takes until I get a straight answer. See you're just as subtle as all the other Austinites I've encountered. How sad that you're helping to prove me right how lame Austin is.

Free or inexpensive things to do in your town? I live in the Harrisburg, PA area so I have do the DC, Baltimore, MD, Hershey, PA, Philly & Gettysburg, PA thing. What I would like to know is if my family and I were traveling your way what would be some cool interesting things to do and see that woulnt cost an arm and a leg? We love arts, sports, history...you name it, if it is new to our family, we want to try it! Thank you! Please feel free, if you are looking for the same I can tell you things in the PA area that are worth while (Especially DC since the zoo and all the hotels are free).

Sign Humor. And I dont want to hear about how long it is. I can see it myself. Or about how much time i have.? A sign seen on a restroom dryer at O'Hare Field in Chicago: Do not activate with wet hands. At a car dealership: The best way to get back on your feet? Miss a car payment. At A Laundry Shop: How about we refund your money, send you a new one at no charge, close the store and have the manager shot. Would that be satisfactory? At a Music Store: Out to lunch. Bach at 12:30. Offenbach sooner. At a number of US military bases: Restricted to unauthorized personnel. At a pizza shop: 7 days without pizza makes one weak. At a Santa Fe gas station: We will sell gasoline to anyone in a glass container. At a tire shop in Milwaukee: Invite us to your next blowout. At a Towing Company: We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows. At a Used Car Lot: Second Hand cars in first crash condition. At an Auto Body Shop: May we have the next dents? At an optometrist's office: If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place. At the electric company: We would be delighted if you send in your bill. However, if you don't, you will be. At the entrance of the large machinery plant: Warning to young ladies: If you wear loose clothes, beware of the machinery. If you wear tight clothes, beware of the machinist. Billboard on the side of the road: Keep your eyes on the road and stop reading these signs. Car Lot: The best way to get on your feet....Miss a car payment. Church sign: To remove worry wrinkles, get your faith lifted. Door of a plastic surgeon’s office: Hello. May we pick your nose? English Sign in German Cafe: Mothers, Please Wash Your Hands Before Eating. Gym: Merry Fitness and a Happy New Rear! In a Beauty Shop: Dye now! In a cafeteria: Shoes are required to eat in the cafeteria. Socks can eat any place they want. In a cleaner’s window: Anyone leaving their garments here for more than 30 days will be disposed of. In a counselors office: Growing old is mandatory, growing wise is optional. In a dentist office: Be true to your teeth or they will be false to you. In a department store: Bargain Basement Upstairs. In a dry cleaner's emporium: Drop your pants here. In a dry cleaner's window: Anyone leaving their garments here for more than 30 days will be disposed of. In a farmer’s field: The farmer allows walkers to cross the field for free, but be aware that the bull charges. In a Florida maternity ward: No children allowed. In a health food shop window: Closed due to illness. In a hotel during a conference: For anyone who has children and doesn’t know it, there is day care on the first floor. In a Laundromat: Automatic washing machines. Please remove all your clothes when the light goes out. In a Los Angeles clothing store: Wonderful bargains for men with 16 and 17 necks. In a Los Angeles dance hall: Good clean dancing every night but Sunday. In a Maine restaurant: Open seven days a week and weekends. In a New York medical building: Mental Health Prevention Center In a New York restaurant: Customers who find our waitresses rude ought to see the manager. In a non-smoking area: If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action. In a Pennsylvania cemetery: Persons are prohibited from picking flowers from any but their own graves. In a Podiatrist's window: Time wounds all heels. In a restaurant window: Don't stand there and be hungry, come in and get fed up. In a safari park: Elephants please stay in your car In a Tacoma, Washington men's clothing store: 15 men's wool suits - $100 - They won't last an hour! In a Texas funeral parlor: Ask about our layaway plan. In a toilet: Toilet out of order. Please use floor below. In a veterinarian’s waiting room: Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay! In an office building washroom: Toilet out of order. Please use floor below. In an office: After the tea break, staff should empty the teapot and stand upside down on the draining board. In an office: Would the person who took the step ladder yesterday kindly bring it back or further steps will be taken. In downtown Boston: Callahan Tunnel - NO END In front of a New Hampshire car wash: If you can't read this, it's time to wash your car. In the front yard of a funeral home: Drive carefully. We’ll wait. In the offices of a New Jersey loan company: Ask about our plans for owning your home. In the vestry of a New England church: Will the last person to leave please see that the perpetual light is extinguished. In the window of a Kentucky appliance store: Don't kill your wife. Let our washing machine do the dirty work. In the window of an Oregon general store: Why go elsewhere to be cheated, when you can come here? Inside a bowling alley: Please be quiet. We need to hear a pin drop. Maternity Clothes Shop: We are open on Labor Day. Message on a leaflet: If you cannot read, this leaflet will tell you how to get lessons. Notice in a field: The farmer allows walkers to cross the field for free, but the bull charges. On a butcher's window: Let me meat your needs. On a church door: This is the gate of Heaven. Enter ye all by this door. (This door is kept locked because of the draft. Please use side entrance) On a desk in a reception room: We shoot every 3rd salesman, and the 2nd one just left. On a display of "I love you only" Valentine cards: Now available in multi-packs. On a fence: Salesmen welcome. Dog food is expensive. On a local plumbing company's trucks in NE Pennsylvania: Don’t sleep with a drip. Call your plumber. On a Maine shop: Our motto is to give our customers the lowest possible prices and workmanship. On a maternity room door: Push. Push. Push. On a Music Teacher's door: Out Chopin. On a New York convalescent home: For the sick and tired of the Episcopal Church On a plumber's truck: We repair what your husband fixed. On a repair shop door: We can repair anything. (Please knock hard — bell out of order.) On a restaurant: Try our fish just for the halibut. On a roller coaster: Watch your head. On a Scientist's door: Gone Fission On a taxidermist's window: We really know our stuff. On a Tennessee highway: Take notice: when this sign is under water, this road is impassable. On an electrician's truck: Let us remove your shorts. On an established New Mexico dry cleaning store: Thirty-eight years on the same spot. On an United Airlines emergency exit row instruction card: If you cannot read this card... On another Butcher's window: Pleased to meat you. On the door of a Computer Store: Out for a quick byte. On the door of a Music Library: Bach in a min-u-et. On the grounds of a private school in Connecticut: No trespassing without permission. On the menu of a New Orleans restaurant: Blackened bluefish On the wall of a Baltimore estate: Trespassers will be prosecuted to the full extent of the law. - Sisters of Mercy Outside a country shop in West Virginia: We buy junk and sell antiques. Outside a disco: Smarts is the most exclusive disco in town. Everyone welcome. Outside a farm: Horse manure, pre-packed bags, $10. Or, do-it-yourself, $1. Outside a Hotel: Help! We need inn-experienced people. Outside a muffler shop: No appointment necessary. We heard you coming. Outside a photographer’s studio: Out to lunch; if not back by five, out for dinner. Outside a radiator repair shop: Best place in town to take a leak. Outside a second-hand store: We exchange anything - bicycles, washing machines etc. Why not bring your wife along and get a wonderful bargain. Pizza shop slogan: 7 days without pizza makes one Weak. Plumber: We repair what your husband Fixed. Quicksand warning: Quicksand. Any person passing this point will be drowned. By order of the District Council. Seen during a conference: For anyone who has children and doesn't know it, there is a day care on the first floor. Sign at the psychic's Hotline: Don't call us, we'll call you. This was seen on a car being towed by a large motor home: I go where I'm towed to. Trucks of a local plumbing company in NE Pennsylvania: Don't sleep with a drip call your plumber. ======================================== International Signs (Mis-Translations) ======================================== Acapulco hotel sign: The manager has personally passed all the water served here. Athens Hotel: Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 daily. Athens, Greece hotel: Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 A.M. daily. Austrian hotel catering to skiers: Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension. Bangkok dry cleaners: Drop your trousers here for best results. Bangkok temple: It is forbidden to enter a woman even a foreigner if dressed as a man. Belgrade hotel elevator: To move the cabin, push botton for wishing floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order. Bucharest hotel lobby: The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable. Budapest zoo: Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty. Copenhagen airline ticket office: WE take your bags and send them in all directions. Czechoslovakian tourist agency: Take one of our horse-driven city tours--we guarantee no miscarriages. Denmark: in a Copenhagen airline ticket office: We take your bags and send them in all directions. Finnish washroom faucet: To stop the drip, turn cock to right. German/Austria: a sign in a hotel catering to skiers read Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension. German/Germany: in a Leipzig elevator: Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up. Germany's Black forest sign: It is strictly forbidden on our black forest camping site that people of different sex, for instance, men and women, live together in one tent unless they are married with each other for that purpose. Hong Kong supermarket: For your convenience, we recommend courageous, efficient self-service. Hong Kong tailor shop: Ladies may have a fit upstairs. Istanbul hotel corridor sign: Please to evacuate in hall especially which is accompanied by rude noises. Japanese hotel room: Please to bathe inside the tub. Japanese hotel: You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid. Japanese information booklet about a hotel air conditioner: Cooles and Heates: If you want just condition of war in your room, please control yourself. Kyushi, Japan Detour sign: Stop: Drive Sideways. Leipzig elevator: Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up. London department store: Bargain basement upstairs. London office: After tea break staff should empty the teapot and stand upside down on the draining board. Majorcan shop entrance: English well talking. Majorcan shop entrance: Here speeching American. Moscow hotel lobby across from a Russian Orthodox monastery: You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists and writers are buried daily except Thursday. Moscow hotel room door: If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are welcome to it. Norwegian cocktail lounge: Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar. Paris dress shop: Dresses for street walking. Paris hotel elevator: Please leave your values at the front desk. Rhodes tailor shop: Order your summers suit. Because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation. Roman doctor's office: Specialist in women and other diseases. Rome laundry: Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time. Sweden: in the window of a Swedish furrier: Fur coats made for ladies from their own skin. Swiss mountain inn: Special today -- no ice cream. Thailand: an ad for donkey rides asked Would you like to ride on your own ass?. Tokyo bar: Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts. Tokyo hotel: Is forbidden to steal hotel towels please. If you are not person to do such thing is please not to read this notice. Tokyo shop: Our nylons cost more than common, but you’ll find they are best in the long run. Vienna hotel: In case of fire, do your utmost to alarm the hotel porter. Vienna, Austria hotel: In case of fire, do your utmost to alarm the hotel porter. Yugoslavia: a sign in a hotel read The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid. Turn to her straightaway. Yugoslavia: in the Europa Hotel, in Sarajevo, you will find this message on every door: Guests should announce the abandonment of theirs rooms before 12 o'clock, emptying the room at the latest until 14 o'clock, for the use of the room before 5 at the arrival or after the 16 o'clock at the departure, will be billed as one night more.. Zurich hotel: Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose. I know they repeat themselves. I got this off of a web site and i copy and pasted it!!!

What is it that everyone thinks is so fabulous about Austin, Texas? This city blows!? Austin is way overrated. I just graduated from Texas State University in San Marcos. Now I'm moving to Colorado. Thank god! Austin sucks! First of all, Austin is not as liberal as everyone thinks it is. So ot's liberal compared to Amarillo, Waco, Lubbock, and Killeen, and every other redneck cowtown around Texas. That's not saying much. Are people forgetting that Austin is the capital of Texas, one of the most ultra-conservative States in the union? Trust me! I know what liberalism is. I was stationed in San Francisco for 2 years when I was in the Coast Guard. That's liberal! If Austin is so liberal, then why hasn't that light rail been built? Why is the black population there shrinking? Why do the Austin Police act like a bunch of thugs? Why did they have to shut down Johnston High for over a year because the testing scores were so low? The weather is hotter than hell about nine months out of the year. Every time I walk outside, it's like walking into a sweat lodge. They still haven't expanded IH-35 even though this city has been growing here exponentially. The music there sucks; the clubs there suck; the cost of living sucks; and the traffic sucks. The wages here also suck because they're not inflation-adjusted. I thought Austin was cool when I first moved here back in the summer of '96, but I regret moving back here in the summer '04 when I was discharged from the service. The only reason why I did was to finish school and because I have family here. You can rest assured I won't be coming back this time. Austin has that same "cowboy/redneck" mentality as the rest of Texas. The people here have no class or manners. They are rude as hell. The people here are crass, conniving, arrogant, temperamental, inconsiderate, boisterous, overbearing, and volatile. I worked in customer service here and I absolutely despised it. You can learn a lot about people just by working in retail. Often times that's when their true colors show. Every time I go into a restaurant, they're always wearing cutoffs, shorts, flip-flops, ratty jeans, or tank-tops. They're white trash! In San Francisco people would dress up nicely. That's only reasonable when you go to a high-class restaurant, is it not? They say Austin is a friendly city. They weren't very specific, and they forgot to say that it's superficially friendly or fair-weather friendly. The women there are very shallow and conceited. That's to be expected because they're a bunch of UT students and UT tends to cultivate that "holier than thou" mentality. They say Austin is a great place to live if you're single. Maybe if you've got lots of money that's the case. A few hippies live in the inner city, but all they do is take-up space and panhandle for money. Leslie Cochran doesn't even hang out downtown anymore. There are a lot more yuppies and preppy UT students there than there are hippies. Everywhere else they've been replaced by beer-drinking rednecks. I wouldn't be surprised if I found out the only thing they've built is more trailer parks here. There is no culture whatsoever in Austin. Why doesn't the "Live Music Capital of the World" have an opera, symphony, orchestra, or a live theater? Where's the zoo? Where's the theme park? Where are the professional sports? Where's the aquarium? Where's the planetarium? Where are all the museums? I know San Antonio is down the road. Gas isn't getting any cheaper, so it would seem very impractical to have to drive all the way to San Antonio do anything big. Not everybody wants to go down to Sixth Street and rub elbows with a bunch of drunken frat boys and watch a bunch of 40-year-old adolescents play rock-a-billy. Baltimore is right down the road from Washington, DC. San Diego is right down the road from LA San Jose is right down the road from San Francisco. But these cities still have all those amenities. Yes, Austin does have a few nice parks. Big deal! Every city has nice parks. Houston has nice parks, too. That place is still a rathole. I know because that's where I grew up. I wouldn't be caught dead living back there. Houston at least has culture and several things to do though which Austin clearly doesn't. Even the radio stations here suck. To put it bluntly, Austin is nothing more than an under-developed, uncultured, and over-glorified college town that refuses to grow up and become a mature city. The entire cultural hearth revolves around one university full of rich, snotty, preppy students.

Will these be true ? Headlines from the year 2049 Hold on to your chad. Texas Executes Last Remaining Citizen Court Clears AOL Time Warner GE-Disney Cisco Ford RJR-Nabisco Exxon-Mobil of Monopoly Charges 50-Year Study: Diet and Exercise Key to Weight Loss Baby Conceived Naturally It Wasn't the Cigarettes - It Was the Ashtrays Great and Benevolent Galactic Ruler Reveals That Anal Probes Were "Just For Fun" Mother Monica Dies: Revered Hero of Bangkok Slums Overcame Lurid Past With U.S. President Florida to Be Readmitted to Union Plague of Spotted Owls Threaten Crops, Livestock Wealthy Widow Anna Nicole Smith, 83, Weds Handsome Young Actor. "This Is True Love," he beams. Construction Begins On Grenada War Memorial In DC President "Bonecrusher" Jones to Face Chief Justice "Mad Dog" Ortega In Cage Match! Baltimore Rams Defeat St. Louis Ravens Pope Phil II Settles Custody Battle With Ex-Wife Upcoming NFL Draft Likely to Focus On Mutants Elder Generation's Music Provokes Outrage among Youth DC Zoo to Receive Rare Cow Authentic Year 2000 Chad Sells For $6.9 Million at Sotheby's Nursing Home Lawsuit Case: Clinton Denies Candy Striper's Allegations

I anyone know of any good large companies to apply to in the Raleigh/Durham area? My family and I will be relocating to the Raleigh/Durham Area from Baltimore, MD in August 2009, and I was wondering if anyone knew of any good large companies to apply to. I'm looking for large companies because they usually give training classes and have dates in which to fill them so it'll be easier for them to accept my application so far in advance than a smaller company. I also would like to know which areas are good for families to live/buy in that area. What are some of the pros and cons that other northerners have found upon moving down to NC, and where are some good places to visit, like zoo's, aquariums, amusement parks, and other family activities. Thanks.

Why does everyone thing Austin is so great? This city sucks! It's way overrated. First of all, it's not as liberal as everyone thinks it is. Yes! It's liberal compared to Ft. Worth, Amarillo, Lubbock, and every other redneck cowtown in Texas. That's a no-brainer. Obviously there aren't too many Austinites that have ever lived in San Francisco. That's liberal! There's a huge difference between the two. If Austin is THAT liberal, then t he black population here wouldn't be shrinking. Second, there's nothing to do here but hang out with a bunch of frat boys down on Sixth Street. Why doesn't the "Live Music Capital of the World" have a symphony? Where's the zoo, museums, planetarium, theme park, and other cultural activities? This city has no culture whatsoever. Yes, San Antonio is right down the road. So what! Baltimore is right down the road from DC. San Diego is right down the road from LA. Their proximities to other major cities didn't stop them from having culture though, did they?

Will Austin ever become a mature city? What I mean is will it have more amenities. Austin is a walk-in-the-park compared to Houston where I grew up. I love the outdoor scenes and the easy-going, tolerant, liberal mentality. It's a much cleaner, safer, and friendlier city than Houston. I enjoyed the Blanton Museum, and I feel that's a big step forward. Meanwhile, I wish Austin had more entertainment. For example, I wish there was a theme park, planetarium, zoo, aquarium, and more museums. A professional sports team would be nice, too. I don't mean to harp on Austin, but not everybody wants to go down to Sixth Street and get smashed or see live music. I think it would be nice if Austin was a more dominant city with a more versatile culture. I know San Antonio is down the road, but Austin shouldn't have to live in the hinterland of San Antonio. Baltimore is an hour away from Washington, DC. San Jose is near San Francisco. But their proximity to other large cities, didn't stop them from broadening their horizons. Can Austin surmount this, too? I have another question here, that should make the Austinites feel better if anyone is interested. http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Ao.bx9KDEeESbIJdqjaapCjsy6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20090526143131AAtbFvx

I want to take a trip and I will be traveling alone. Which of these options would offer the most to do? I enjoy restaurants/bars, culture, zoos/aquariums, shopping, outdoor adventures or just hiking/biking through a park, some history and I love sight-seeing & visiting city icons like the St. Louis Arch, the Space Needle or a famous port or pier. I am in my early 30's. Here are the options: Baltimore Chicago Denver Hartford, CT Minneapolis/St. Paul Portland Providence Reno/Tahoe Salt Lake City Seattle/Tacoma Spokane I would also like to hear suggestions about what to do in these places. I would like a city with good infrastructure, where it is fairly easy to get along, and I would like a city with a friendly culture, should I need directions or help getting around. Nice weather would be good (traveling near the end of September), but I don't mind some rain here and there. If it's not on the list, then it's not an option. Plus I've already been to Philly.

Anyone work at the Baltimore Zoo in Baltimore, Maryland? what is the name of the hospital they use for their animals?

How did the houston baby elephant get the herpes? http://www.khou.com/news/local/stories/Khou081109_mp_mac-the-elephant-is-sick.1988a71f0.html?npc HOUSTON -- Mac, the Asian elephant calf born at the Houston Zoo two years ago, began treatment on Sunday for elephant herpes virus, an often fatal virus that can affect elephants in the wild and in zoos. The history of the herpes virus in the North American Asian elephant population has been studied since 1999 when researchers at Johns Hopkins School of Medicine in Baltimore and at the National Zoo in Washington identified the virus.